Behind the Tears of a Clown
by Melethril
Summary: Tony has lived in the spotlight for as long as he could remember. He had learned very early to give back as good as he got… or to shut someone down before they could land a blow. He was one of the most successful businessmen in the world. He had a very thick skin. Sometimes though, the walls were not thick enough.
1. Behind the Tears of a Clown

_A/N_ : _This story is set a few months after the first Avengers movie._

 _Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me._

* * *

 **Behind the Tears of a Clown**

After yet another successful mission, Steve decided that the team deserved and needed some time for relaxation. Tony had wanted to invite them to that nice Italian place he loved (the only _real_ Italian place in New York according to his mother), but Steve had rejected his proposal saying that it seemed unfair to Tony that he ended up paying for their food every time. No matter how much he protested and insisted that he did not care about money as long as the food was worth it, and that he did not mind paying for their meals (he actually _liked_ taking care of his team; outside of technology, money was the only thing he had ever been able offer to any kind of personal relationship, and seeing them well-fed and content was all he wanted), but Steve had politely blown him off.

Now they were walking into a bar that Clint liked. Apparently, they served great burgers at a good price as well as lots of entertainment including Stand-Up Comedy Night every Friday, which was today.

The entire team (with the exception of Thor who was still in Asgard) was excited, even Natasha seemed _positive_ about the outing (that was about as far as Tony could categorize her enthusiasm), Clint looked gleeful, Bruce seemed a bit unsure about entering a club with so many people but was otherwise curious, and Steve smiled brightly when he saw the sign about tonight's event commending Clint's suggestion. Tony… He was a professional at quick verbal sparring and smooth replies with years of practice, with the ability to face off any nasty reporter, sly businessman or crafty politician that crossed his path. He had partied with important stars and starlets of Hollywood; he knew all of the Rich and Famous, but there was one guild that he could not win against, and he knew it.

Comedians played a crowd not unlike he could; Hell, he had used such techniques to face off rivals multiple times in the past ( _Hello there, Mr. Hammer, Senator_ ): make the audience laugh about the ones you antagonized. It was so easy and incredibly efficient. However, Tony also knew his limits. He knew how to play in the crowd's favor, but in general, they preferred witnessing him getting his ass kicked by his betters, because people ultimately believed that he had to be taken down a peg or two. He had tried to go against comedians in the past, and he always lost; in the end, he was the one people laughed at.

Having learned his lessons and simply too vary from today's fight, he decided to keep a low profile as they entered the club.

For the first hour, everything went well; they had a few laughs both from the show on stage as well as from standard group antics, and the burgers were indeed fantastic. However, it all changed once Steve left to get some more beers and the crowd started to cheer enthusiastically. Tony looked up and saw a young white male in his mid- to late twenties stepping onto the stage. He bowed exorbitantly and the crowd's cheers intensified.

"That's Chris Meyer. He owns the club," Clint whispered, "not financially, but he rules the place whenever he's on stage. People think that he'll get really big one day. No topic too controversial, but always funny. Great comedian."

Steve returned with five beers that he skillfully carried in his right hand and was just about to sit down when Meyer's eyes were suddenly on the tall man.

"Bless my soul, is that…? Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a true hero in our midst tonight: Captain America!" All eyes followed the comedian's gaze until the settled on the table they occupied. "This is an honor, sir, thank you for coming here tonight! Do you have anything to say to the crowd?"

Steve was sharp and quick-witted when he felt comfortable (Tony and him were regularly exchanging barbs) or for after-mission interviews, but he was hopelessly lost when put in the spotlight like this.

"Uh…"

"True eloquence!" Meyer exclaimed making the audience laugh. "That should teach you whenever you assume that there is more brawns than brains to that guy."

Steve's cheek colored and the tall man ducked his head slightly. The moment Tony wanted to stand up and help his friend out, Meyers let off of him and told a random story that made people laugh. Tony started to relax.

Until…

"Anthony Edward Stark," Meyer's eyes lit up in sheer delight and Tony felt his stomach drop. He was trapped underwater, and the sharks had just smelled the blood. "How grand of you to honor us with your presence!"

The audience started to whisper and gesture at the table full of heroes, and Tony watched Bruce out of the corners of his eyes because he feared that the man might get a little too tense with all the attention.

"And here I thought you only ate caviar for breakfast."

The opening was almost kind, but Tony had been around predators his entire life. He knew this was only the beginning. He decided to indulge though, "Well, it's evening, so…"

"That's right!" Meyer exclaimed almost jumping up and down in excitement recognizing this glorious opportunity. "Tony Stark, everybody: the only celebrity with a mortal fear of can openers." The crowd laughed. "The Merchant of Death; according to innumerable fine women all across the world, the Merchant of the Little Death as well, or la petite mort as the French would say."

Tony smiled forcing himself to chuckle. He hated the moniker, had hated it long before Afghanistan, only he had not known its true meaning until then.

"Tony Stark, who, if he went by the tradition of naming his children on the day of conception, was forced to call them Chlamydia and Syphilis."

The blow was not as low as Tony had expected, but it looked like Meyer was in it for the long haul. The comedian gave the audience a moment to recover before he decided to let the billionaire off the hook a bit.

"No, seriously, Mr. Stark, it's an honor to have you here. It's like having a prince among us who decided to step down from his High Tower of Ugliness."

Tony heard Steve suppress a chuckle and looked at the man. He remembered Cap's comment (of course he did, he never forgot conversations no matter how much he would like to), but he had thought that by letting the team set up their camp (home) there, they would start to appreciate it a bit more.

Steve looked sheepish at his own reaction however and Tony smiled because the other man obviously tried.

"Have you guys seen that tower? How could you not as it's been put right in front of our fucking faces?" Meyer continued by firmly pressing his hand on his face making a nasal sound to imitate a broken nose. The audience howled with laughter. "It will go right down with the great monuments of the past. I can see it in the history books: the Great Pyramids, the Wall of China, the Louvre and Stark Tower."

He was good, Tony had to admit, laughing along; he was not outstanding, but good, working extremely well with voice, gestures and a dry wit. Put that together with the reputation he obviously had, and he was bound to give his crowd a fabulous time.

"I bet Stark is so rich, he keeps mistaking his hundred-dollar bills for one-dollar bills." At that, Clint laughed because that actually happened once. It was not like Tony paid in cash all that much and he had not paid attention that day. So what if he tipped the ice-cream place by 1000%? It was not like he cared. Meyer noticed Clint's reaction and there was a decidedly unholy gleam in his eyes after that. The shark was now circling its prey. "He is so rich that he would buy you a bar if you said you were thirsty."

The entire team chuckled. That also happened only once, but they'd refused to serve the Hulk, so what was he supposed to do?

"Captain America, sir, did Stark ever offer you armor?"

There was a moment of silence and Steve replied, "Well, better suits, yes."

"Just make sure you check the thing for repulsor beams first, or you might get flung across the room."

The engineer had to give it to him. The man had certainly done his homework. His team laughed, clearly remembering the gadgets that he had supplied with the gear he had made for them.

"Is it true that Iron Man is as chatty as Tony Stark?" the comedian continued, "Because if that is correct, you are all true superheroes: Listening to the man blabbering away while killing the villains instead of trying to shut him up… Now that's truly heroic."

The others laughed, of course. How many times had they told him to shut up on and off missions? He had stopped counting (' _243 times_ ,' his brain supplied unhelpfully).

"I mean, nobody denies that the man is a genius, right? After all, to create something as marvelous as the Iron Man suit after having destroyed more than half of his brain cells with drugs and alcohol is astonishing."

Now, he was getting more vicious, but Meyer treaded carefully, obviously having no wish to antagonize the rest of the team.

"But God, the man just won't shut up!" the stand-up comedian continued. "I feel sorry for his CEO and former PA Virginia Potts." Tony's stomach flip-flopped oh-so-painfully. "Dealing with such enormous egotism, and extrovert exhibitionism every hour equals excruciating exhaustion. And that was alliteration, Ladies and Gentleman," Meyers spoke over the snickers and applause. Tony refused to look at Natasha; he knew that she was smiling.

"Speaking of exhibitionism, have you seen the images from that gigantic Stark Christmas Party in 2010?" It took all of the billionaire's willpower not to freeze, and his heart was beating far too fast. He remembered that party. He glanced at Steve and wished he had not. The man's face was red from embarrassment. Of course, Meyer did not miss that reaction either. "Ohhhh, I think Captain America has seen the photos." The audience roared. "It must be weird to work alongside a man who has been in every position imaginable. At least you don't need to question his flexibility in battle." Again, people laughed, but Tony did not bother this time. He just wanted it to be over. Steve looked mortified, but he still smiled at the engineer as if hoping to cheer him up. "However, you might just want feed him some bleach at some point and put him into a decontamination shower, just so you can pad him down without catching something."

Bruce stood up abruptly and the audience fell silent in the middle of ongoing hysterics.

"Guys, we've got to go. The Other Guy is not pleased," Bruce whispered harshly, but there was a deep, growling quality to it that was slightly menacing; he looked simultaneously panicked and eerily calm.

Yes, it was high time to leave. Tony put a hand on Bruce shoulder to pacify him, but the other man's reaction was so quick and vicious, the engineer took a step back. He was not afraid of the Hulk, he refused to be, but it was obvious that Tony's presence brought his friend's other personality too close to the surface and they were in the middle of the crowd, so Tony took himself out of the equation by taking the lead in leaving the place.

Not before taking a exaggerated bow to the audience, though.

If you were treated like a clown, you better behave like one, or people would tell you that you had no sense of humor.

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 _A/N: I like humor and I like comedy, but it can be vicious at times and it can go several steps too far. And laughter is something you cannot really defend yourself against without being called spoilsport._

 _Thanks for reading! I love reviews :-)_


	2. The King's Knight

**The King's Knight**

Outside, the others tried to talk Bruce down, but from the tinge of green in his eyes and on his skin, Tony could tell immediately that it was futile. He sidestepped Steve quickly and stood right in front of his big, green friend.

"Hi, Big Guy," the engineer said gently. The Hulk was probably the only being on Earth who thought that Tony's voice was calming; yet another reason why Bruce' alter ego was _awesome_. The physicist certainly enjoyed the science talk, but the man obviously was not used to a lot of company and Tony's enthusiasm could be tiring at times. Thankfully, the physicist had nerves of steel.

The Hulk approached him rapidly, looking furious. Tony tilted his head as he ignored his rapidly beating heart. Why was the Hulk angry with him?

All thoughts came to a halt when his fellow Avenger bent down and two giant arms pulled him to a strong, green chest with remarkable gentility.

He had always thought that Jarvis, Rhodey and his mother gave the best hugs ever, but this here made him believe that the world could come to an end and he would still be safe. All tension just dissolved as he wrapped his arms somewhat halfway around his friend's body. He closed his eyes and pressed his face to Big Green's chest.

* * *

Steve felt a moment of utmost terror when the Hulk's arms engulfed their physically most vulnerable member. He readied himself for a fight until he realized that Tony did not seem to be in pain. Instead, the engineer just seemed to _melt_ into the hug, exhaled with a sigh and hid his face like a toddler who was being hugged by its mother. The moment was so precious, he wanted to captivate it with pencil and paper; his fingers practically itched for his drawing utensils. A soft 'click' had him turn around, just in time to see Natasha put away her phone.

Another wave of fear came over him when the Hulk reached up with his right hand touching the back of Tony's head and neck (as well as shoulders). The incredibly powerful and strong being could crush the brilliant billionaire's brain without trying! However, it did not look like Tony was in pain or uncomfortable; on the contrary, Steve felt like he was intruding this moment.

What he did not understand was why the Hulk had felt the need to appear in the first place.

"Hulk," he said cautiously, not wanting to startle him and taking the risk of hurting Tony. "Is something wrong?"

Hulk growled… or grumbled; the super soldier was not able to tell the difference.

"Tony hurt," said 'Jolly Green' as the giant's current teddy bear liked to call him.

That comment had Tony lift his head; or rather he wiggled a little bit in order for Bruce Banner's alter ego to realize that he had to give him space.

The billionaire caught their largest teammate's gaze and said gently with a certain roughness to his voice as if he had just woken up from a dream, "I am alright, Big Guy."

"No," Hulk denied. "Tony hurt. Tony ready for battle. Tony like Tony before become Metal Man."

Steve was not sure what the Hulk was talking about, but the billionaire seemed to.

"I am sorry," said he, clearly chagrined, his arms still clumsily around about a third of the green giant's upper body.

It was like the world turned on its axis. He had _never_ heard Tony apologize. While he accepted the man's clumsy attempt at returning Steve's apology for what had been said on the Helicarrier, the man had never said sorry on his own volition to this day.

"Tony, what is going on?" said Steve, but Natasha quickly voiced what the man from Brooklyn already feared.

"You felt like you'd been attacked in the club, and not only did we not see it, we laughed alongside the enemy," she analyzed almost cruelly.

Still entangled in the Hulk's arms, Tony did his best to turn around.

"What? No, that's ridiculous! I wasn't attacked, I was just…"

"Taken apart verbally," said Clint. He looked very young for a moment, clearly feeling responsible for the mess. "I am sorry we went there today. Meyer always goes against the big ones: politicians, companies, you name it he did it. I should've known. I…"

"Hold your horses, Legolas," Tony interrupted. He still leaned into the hug, obviously enjoying the physical closeness to his friend. It did restrict his normally very expressive hands, though. "No need to apologize. It's not like we went there hoping to be seen. We were there anonymously, and we were found out by accident. Even so, this was _tame_ compared to what I've been subjected to, really. If you dish out, you better be able to take it as well. I'm good." Then he turned to the Hulk. "Thanks for the backup, Big Guy!"

The Hulk snorted, but did not look convinced, "Puny Tony needs the Hulk."

"Every day, Jolly Green," replied the billionaire softly and sincerely. It was amazing how gently the Hulk and Tony treated each other, Steve realized for the first time. While the green giant was physically tender and careful, Tony – who could flay anyone verbally in two seconds flat – abandoned all sarcasm and any other kind of defense mechanism whenever he talked to the strong but essentially very young giant. "But I am good now."

As the Hulk deflated and slowly started to turn into the ingenious physicist, Steve addressed his teammate, "You were not though, earlier. You were bullied, and I didn't do anything about it. I am sorry too, Tony. I've always fought bullies, and I apologize for not interfering."

"Good God, Cap," Tony laughed, which sounded a bit forced and made Steve feel even worse as he saw the genius' masks fall back into place. "You underestimate my ability to take bullshit. Let's go home and enjoy some movies. I still haven't introduced you to Indiana Jones."

Tony then turned to the newly transformed physicist, whom he had gently lowered to the ground. "Welcome back, Dr. Banner."

"Did I hurt anybody?" The familiar question was asked.

"Never," was the engineer's reply even before the last syllable was spoken.

As they returned back to the Avengers Tower, Steve resolved to talk to Chris Meyer the next day. He could and would never condone bullying. Talking to a man whose profession was entertainment about how words could actually hurt its subjects may be a small thing, but every little thing could change the world.

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Thank you so much for reading. I love reviews.


	3. The Court Jester

_A/N: I can't seem to stop this series… My comment for this installment? There is always more than one side to a coin, even if you don't agree with one of them._

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 _Chapter 3: The Court Jester_

Steve kindly thanked the young lady who had shown him the way to Chris Meyer's dressing room. She blushed crimson and quickly headed back to the bar she served at. Softly, Steve knocked, and was glad to hear a quick 'it's open unless I owe you money.'

"Good evening, Mr. Meyer," said Steve as he entered. "I am sorry for interrupting, but I would like to talk to you."

"Oh, wow!" Meyer's eyes went almost comically wide as he realized who had just entered. "Captain America, sir, it's an honor to see you in my humble abode." There was hardly any sarcasm in his tone. "Is this about the other night? I hope my 'more brawns than brains' joke didn't offend you. Everybody knows you are a tactical genius, the 'man with a plan' so to speak, so the jab was all in good humor. Nobody will believe it anyway."

"No, I was not offended, I…"

"Good," Meyer looked genuinely relieved. "I just wanted to say that you've been a huge inspiration for me. Look at me," he gestured at himself: a rather short, thin man with dark hair. He did not look strange in any way; if anything, he seemed unremarkable. "I sucked at sports in High School and pretty much the only way for me to get any kind of attention or to be left alone was to play the class clown." He chuckled shyly. "It got me here, but you… You were a skinny, asthmatic guy just like me, and you fought against the bullies in the world, and I swore to do the same. In my own way, I fight against narrow-minded bigotry, just like you do."

Earnestly, the comedian looked up into Steve's face, and the super soldier wished he did not have to disappoint him.

"So, you decided to become a bully yourself?" asked Steve softly and, though he was prepared for it, hated the flinch that followed.

"Bully? No, why would you…?"

Steve's memory had been excellent long before the serum, now it was eidetic, so it was not difficult to remember Meyer's performance just a week ago, " _'Tony Stark, who, if he went by the tradition of naming his children on the day of conception, was forced to call them Chlamydia and Syphilis'_ , ' _Dealing with such enormous egotism, and extrovert exhibitionism every hour equals excruciating exhaustion_ '? Or my personal favorite: ' _However, you might just want feed him with some bleach at some point and put him into a decontamination shower, just so you can pad him down without catching something_.'"

Meyer blanched, "That's not bullying." It was obviously his firm belief.

"It was hurtful and spiteful. I know that Tony Stark is just a symbol for you, but you saw him that night… You know he's flesh and blood like you and me," began Steve, not understanding how a man so obviously wishing to entertain, could not see how much pain he caused. "Why did you do that?"

To his surprise, Meyer straightened, "In Medieval times, the Court Jester was the only person allowed to criticize the king without risking execution, and yet, the heads rolled occasionally nevertheless."

"Tony's not a…"

"Tony Stark the closest thing to a king in the modern world, Captain. He has an _empire_. He is one of the richest men on Earth. His political influence as a former weapon's manufacturer? I can guarantee you that he has a major part of the Senate and the Congress in his pocket. He can meet with the president on a golf course within a twenty-four hours notice if he so wishes. Not only that, he also rubbed elbows with the rich and beautiful of Hollywood and he can play the press like a fine-tuned instrument. However, all that?" Again, Meyer chuckled. "It would mean nothing if he didn't have the fucking brains to back it up. Not only is he one of the richest, he's also one of the smartest people in the world. A man like that has many enemies, but none that he couldn't destroy in a heartbeat. If he so wished, he could make me disappear. He could end my career with a few well-chosen words to the press, or by pressing a few keys on a computer, or by talking to one of his many friends. I went out on a limb that night, Captain. Tony Stark could _destroy_ me. I am not protected the way the old jesters were, but somebody has to remind the kings of their own mortality."

It was a compelling argument. Truly, he had seen Tony's power first-hand, and he knew how ill he sometimes used it; how horribly hurtful the engineer could be with a few thoughtless words; and how much more painful they were when he used his razor-sharp wit to actually _end_ people he disliked. As an outsider who did not know Tony, how could Meyer have known that the billionaire was well aware of his own mortality? He had only seen the engineer smile and go along with program. He had not seen the genius melt into the Hulk's arms seeking comfort like a drowning man.

"I understand," said Steve. "Really, I do. From your perspective, I know where you come from, but Mr. Meyer, you don't know Tony. He's a good man."

The comedian nodded, but looked skeptical, "Sure. I mean my bank accounts still work, so he's not too spiteful."

This made Steve realize that the comedian would not believe him, not without proof.

"Look, why don't you stop by Avengers Tower sometime? I can show you that Tony's human just like you and me; a good, kind man who's generous to a fault. I trust him with my life."

"Wait, you are inviting me to visit a bunch of superheroes?" Meyer looked positively giddy at the prospect. "Of course! Tell me when, and I'll be there… Hell, I'll camp in front of the Tower the night before."

Steve smiled a little at the childlike enthusiasm, "Tony's out of town today, but he should be back on Saturday noon. Why don't you come by in the morning? Like this, all other personal introductions are out of the way by the time he arrives."

"This sounds perfect. I'd love to. Captain America invites me to Avengers Tower! Nobody will believe that…" Then he hesitated, frowning. "But you have my word that I won't tell anybody anything. I guess you superheroes are particular about your privacy."

Yes, Meyer was a good man. He simply needed to learn that comedy did not necessarily have to mean making fun of people. Meeting the real Tony Stark would help with that.

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Is anybody interested in more? I have a few vague ideas on how to continue this, but I won't bother with fleshing them out if there is no interest.


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